I Wanna Be So Lost, So Lost That I Am Found
by bruninhagalle
Summary: Kurt has to visit one last place before leaving NYC so he can introduce Jane to someone special. Jeller all the way, as always!


**A/N:** Hi, guys! WHAT WAS THAT PREMIERE? What did you guys think about it?! Oh and all the Jeller... Can't even describe it! This story came up as I thought about Jane and Kurt leaving NYC and I just wrote it down. Tell me your thoughts on it!

A special thanks to my amazing beta readers **Thaís Christ e Olia**. You guys are awesome!

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 **I wanna be lost, so lost that I'm found**

Jane was so lost inside her thoughts, trying to make a mental list of everything they still needed to pack for their move to Colorado in the following day, that she didn't notice they were not going home until they were almost out of the city.

"Where are we going?" - She turned to him and paused. The first thing she noted was how white his knuckles were. He was gripping the steering wheel as if his life depended on it. His jaw was set and his expression serious. - "Kurt?"

He cast a quick glance towards her, giving her a reassuring smile and before she could ask again where they were heading, he made a turn and her question was answered.

Jane couldn't help the gasp she let out the moment the cemetery stretched out in front of the car. She suddenly understood everything: he was there to say goodbye to Taylor Shaw.

"I felt like I needed to come here before we…"

She just nodded, her throat tight. They never really talked about Taylor all these months they were together. They've been so happy she never found the right moment to bring her up, even though she wanted to know everything he'd be willing to share about the little girl who defined the man she now called her husband.

Kurt got out of the car and circled it, stopping in front of her door. When she didn't make a move to exit the vehicle, he pulled the door open and offered her a hand.

Jane looked from his hand to his face and back to his hand.

"Kurt, I'm not sure I should,"

"I need you to come with me." - He interrupted her. He had anticipated she wouldn't want to accompany him but this was something they had to do together and soon she'd understand why. - "Please, Jane."

There was nothing she could deny him when he looked at her the way he was now. She accepted his hand and hopped off the car, her face still showing him how unsure she was about going with him.

He intertwined their fingers and pulled her close enough so he could gently kiss her forehead.

"Trust me, ok?" - He whispered against it, feeling her once again just nod her head.

They walked side by side in silence, each lost in their own thoughts. It took them less than five minutes to reach the gravestone that read Taylor Shaw.

She tried to let go of his hand so he could get near where his friend was resting but he only tightened his hold on hers until they were as close to the stone as possible.

"Hi, Taylor." - He greeted quietly. Every time he came here, he always felt stupid talking to a rock but both Dr. Borden and Dr. Sun insisted he should do this. It would help, they said. Today, it felt like the right thing to do. - "I brought someone very special to meet you."

He heard Jane taking a deep breath and when he looked at her, he watched as her eyes started filling with tears.

"Her name is Jane." - He chuckled before continuing, imagining Taylor's reaction to his next piece of information. Meeting his wife's eyes, he completed. - "Jane _Weller_."

Jane closed her eyes for a second, feeling overwhelmed by this moment. She was definitely not expecting to spend her last day on NY hearing Kurt talk to Taylor about her.

"She is my wife." - He carried on, a smile on his lips. He'd never get tired of calling her that. - "She is the best woman I could ever find to spend the rest of my life with. You'd love her." - He was not sure about a lot of things in his life but of one thing he was certain: Taylor and Jane would definitely get along.

"She is strong, kind, loyal and has the most beautiful heart." - Before she could even protest, he tugged her to him, his arms going around her waist and holding her close against his body. - "You are." - He whispered against her temple.

"She is also stubborn as hell." - That got a laugh out of her. - "She is everything to me." - Their eyes met and he smiled down at her, feeling lucky for the thousandth time just by having her in his life. His hand cupped her face and used his thumb to dry her tears. - "And I thought it was past the time you two meet. So... Taylor, this is Jane. Jane, this is Taylor."

He watched as Jane focused on the stone. He was starting to think that maybe she wouldn't say anything when her small voice broke the silence.

"Hi, Taylor." - She realized in that moment that she had so many things to say to the girl she didn't know from where to start. Maybe from the beginning was a good idea. But also a painful one. - "I should start by saying how sorry I am for what happened to you and even more so for impersonating you."

"Jane, that's not why,"

"I know but I need to do this, Kurt." - He shut up at the look of confidence on her face.

He remembered the first day he came here and how many times he apologized for not being able to protect Taylor from his own father and how much better he felt at the end of it. Maybe this was something Jane also needed to go through.

"I'm deeply sorry, Taylor. Nor you, nor Kurt deserved it but," - Her husband was about to cut her off again but she threw him a look that stopped him. - "Even if I wish all that happened hadn't caused so much pain, it also led me to this amazing man." - She locked eyes with him and she was sure he was remembering the exact same moment as her.

 _All of this, it led me to you. And you to m_ _e. That is something I would never want to undo._

"Did he ever tell you he is one of the best FBI agents the Bureau has? Or how he has all these friends that love him so much? We all feel very blessed to know him and have him in our lives." - She looked at him then. - "You'd be so, so proud of him."

Her words surprised him and she observed as his eyes welled with tears.

"As for me, he is the best man I could have found and sometimes I can't believe he chose me to spend the rest of his life with. I assure you I'm doing everything in my power to deserve this choice."

She pressed a soft kiss to his shoulder before going on.

"I promise you I'll always do everything I can to protect him and to make him happy. There is no one I know who deserves more."

He lightly shook his head and she knew what he was thinking: _we both do._

"There is one more thing you should know: he never gave up on you." - His breath caught in his throat, his eyes fixed on her face, waiting for her next words. - "He will always love you and will always remember you. You are a part of him. And if you allow me to say, you are a part of me too. In a way, you brought us together and I'll honor that until the day I die."

She wiped some of his tears away and then wrapped her arms around him, resting her head on his chest as they both stared at the stone.

"We are moving to Colorado tomorrow so we can stay close to Bethany." - Kurt said quietly. - "But we promise you we'll always visit whenever we are in town."

Jane felt her heart filling with joy at how he used the word 'we'.

They made their way back hand in hand. They were almost at the car when Kurt stopped her, a hand on her arm.

"Thank you for everything you said about me, Jane."

"It's all true, Kurt."

"All I said about you it's true too, you know?" - He placed his hands on her waist, bringing her to him. Jane's arms circled his neck. - "And I have the rest of our lives to make you believe it, Mrs. Weller."

She laughed at that, kissing him briefly on the lips.

"I look forward to it, Mr. Weller."


End file.
